Racism Hurts Domestic Violence Victims
I posted this video two weeks ago on my Facebook page, www.facebook.com/afterdomesticviolence .
My schedule has kept me from the community pool this week again, but I know I'll be back next week. When I return, I'm sure I will see the man whose racism inspired the video.
I have a few plans of action that depend on how the situation shapes up. Maybe the guy will ignore me; maybe he will confront me; who knows. I'm spending this week thinking a lot about how to handle the situation best.
I'd love to hear any suggestions in the comments below or on the YouTube page.
Everyone Recovers Differently
You might not see your own story reflected in my posts on recovery from domestic violence. That is all the more reason I invite you to comment below. I can only speak to my own experiences and relate what others have shared with me. The domestic violence in my past is just a drop in the bucket. I made AfterDomesticViolence.com for everyone recovering from domestic abuse. Since domestic violence comes in as many variations as there are victims, your story and your journey matter. Sharing your feelings and thoughts can help in two ways.
Share Your Story, Heal Yourself
Whether your thoughts are positive or negative, giving them a venue can help you. Letting out negative emotions like fear or self-judgement creates an opportunity for others to support you. At the very least, you have me. Also, naming stressors can give a new perspective on them. Sometimes thoughts circle round and around in our minds and become bigger than necessary. I, in those cases, can lower my stress by “trapping” (as I think of it) my problem as words on a webpage. The situation goes from being a boogeyman I can’t quite see to black lines and squiggles I can look at.
Share Your Story, Heal Others
Your participation in conversations about recovery from domestic abuse helps others heal. Back to my point that isolation and domestic abuse go hand in hand, there are others out there who have not heard from someone like you about escaping violence. When victims think they are the only people who suffer a particular abuse tactic, they are more likely to believe they deserve the abuse. The same holds true regarding beliefs about PTSD symptoms. By sharing the good and the bad of your recovery, you can give hope and inspiration to the rest of us.
So what do you need support with right now? What triumphs do you want to shout from the rooftops? What frustrates you? What resources keep you going through the ups and downs of recovery? I look forward to reading what you have to say in the comments below.
Rebecca encourages survivors of domestic to speak about their experiences and to lean on each other for support.